It’s important to be invited.

Those of you who follow me on social media you may have seen that I went to a writers conference recently. I truly want to follow my dreams of becoming a published author and use whatever words that are on my heart to encourage others. It’s one of those things that I know I am supposed to do, I just need a little help figuring out how.

I know that I know that I know: in order to do what we feel led to do, it is up to us to take the next right step. So I did.

That being said, I had to overcome a few fears like

A. Spending money on myself

B. Figuring out how to get my own uber

C. Going somewhere where I wouldn’t know a soul

I am by nature a very outgoing person and typically things like this wouldn’t stop me, but you know how sometimes little things can keep you from being brave? Well, as silly as the fear of getting an uber or going to a conference by myself is, it was one of those nagging feelings that was trying to stop me.

In the end it didn’t, because I got on a plane. I ubered to my hotel. I took the steps.

After a day and a half into the conference around hundreds of people I didn’t know with all of these intermissions between sessions meant for “connection” I found myself feeling a little out of place. Even, a little lonely. I tried to push it away and just be inspired by the content, but it kept knocking at my door. That night as I was walking back to my hotel from the conference those negative thoughts really started to toy with me. All those fears came to a surface…

what am I doing here, how could I leave my sweet fam, I’m not a real writer, everyone seems to know each other and I don’t know anyone, how could I have spent our hard earned money on this big unknown thing, is this ever going to happen?

I knew I was fear battling so I called home for some encouragement. Not getting an answer I finished my long walk back to the hotel and came up with a plan.

Step 1. Get a glass of wine (even though I was doing dry January)

Step 2. Take it to my room

Step 3. Journal, Sulk, and Netflix binge because hey, I’m human.

As I was waiting on the bartender, exhausted from the long day, a few women approached the bar too. Donning the same name tags and bag on their shoulders with their shiny gray hair and super cool glasses, I knew they were from the conference.

Planning to squeak out as soon as I could, one of the women introduced herself cheerfully to me and asked me my name and where I was from. After I responded she introduced me to her friends trailing behind her. They were quick to smile and say hi as they decided on which white wine they would drink. Motioning to a large table where a very trendy looking couple sat she said, “hey…why don’t you join us?”

I thought for a second; I was tired and didn’t quite feel like peopling. But. BUT. I knew in a nanosecond that this was an invitation for more. Less alone, more unknown. Which means more of something else. So, I said, “Sure why not! I’ll have what they’re having.” And what they were having, smelled like joy.

We went on to have a wonderful night of conversation, jokes, encouragement, laughter and too many glasses for dry January participants! And to top it off, that classy looking couple included an established author from England. She took a picture of the cover of the children’s book I am getting published, and said she would love to stay connected and support me on my journey. I just want to cry you guys. Happy tears. I actually am tearing up right now as I write this.

What a blessing out of the Sarasota sky (which is where I was) to have found company in the midst of feeling lonely.

The dichotomy of how I was feeling to where I ended leaves me speechless. We just have NO idea of the ripple effect of an invitation. Whether we are the invitee or the invited, it means so much. It is the easiest way to create relationship, friendship, community and battle loneliness. We do not have to do this life alone. We do not have to take scary brave steps alone. Joy, fullness and sharing the load comes out of the invitation and willingness to step into one another’s life. Even if that step is brief, it could be pivotal to someones aching heart.

I will forever be thankful for Ms. Nicole Williams, Mary, Laura (& husband whom I can’t remember his name but was so kind) and Elyse who was fan girling over Laura’s novels. You don’t know them, I barely know them, but we know their spirits right?

The welcoming. The kind. The ones who are invitational.

I just want to be like that. I want us all to not only find a table to sit at, but once we have a table, to pull up a chair in any given moment - for somebody else.

Questions for Reflection:

Can you think of a time when someone’s invitation changed you?

Is there a place in your life where you could invite someone to join you?

What is your next brave step to take toward your goals and what’s keeping you back?