Overcoming Fear: Lessons from Auditions
At auditions for a play, I sat back in the choreographer's chair next to the director and producer; we are putting on the summer play for our community. Eagerly, we awaited each child’s entrance.
Nervous Energy
Something I noticed was how each child walks in differently. Some stride in confidently with swagger, knowing that this is absolutely they're jam.
Others hesitantly approach the room, shaking with nerves, unsure of where to look.
And then there are those who are somewhere in the middle. Beaming when they show off their strength—whether in acting, singing, or dancing—and shrinking back when they have to perform a part they aren’t so great at.
There's so much nervous energy in the room from all of them. The interesting thing is, we’re rooting for them to do well! We are smiling, cheering for them, encouraging them—but still, that fear is overwhelming and easily visible.
When each group of kids left, I found myself compelled to say, “Auditions are hard, but you did it!” Because I don’t want any kid walking away feeling like they failed or didn’t try their best.
Reflecting on Personal Fears
Each child had to overcome fear to step on the stage in order for them to get to their goal; to be in the play. It led me to wonder if there are things in my life I am afraid to do, but that will take me to what I actually want.
Am I allowing fear to keep me from auditioning for my own role in my life?
There are places where I am really good at challenging myself. For example, I love to sing and my voice isn’t half bad, but I get nervous to sing by myself sometimes. So, I purposely auditioned for and became a part of a professional theater group. I knew it would force me to sing by myself often. And guess what? I was right and it totally helped.
By the end of the season, the director told me I had sung my best solo yet. Making myself practice improved my performance and my nerves!
Other spots in my life, though, I allow my own insecurities to get the best of me. Whether it’s a weak skillset or worrying about what others would think…fear can hinder me from making choices that I know are best.
But - what if it didn’t?
Shifting Mindsets
What if I were to shift my mindset to accept my fear.
Yes, I might be scared, but to get where I want to go, I must do this anyway. Doing things afraid, is still doing them!
Practice makes perfect! Similar to how I joined the theater troupe, applying this idea of practicing to overcome, can help to shift perspective from fear…to do.
Reframing our negative thoughts to a truth like “I have to make choices I am afraid of making in order to get unstuck” can have a huge impact on our mindset.
And, what if instead of being afraid of what people will think, we imagined them actually rooting for us? If I can shift my fear of others to the idea that they want me to succeed, like we did for these sweet auditioning kids, then perhaps it could help you and I overcome our fears.
Your Goals
Do you know what you want?
Name and claim it!
What are your actual goals? The ones you think, “I’ll never be able to do that but I really really want to.” Name the characteristics you want to embody and the purpose you want to run toward. If we can name where we want to head and see that goal in our future, then we have the inspiration to do what it takes when we are afraid.
Once we know where we want to head, then we can consider what small steps it would take to get us there.
Name that fear!
Does fear keep you from doing things you want to do?
If fear is holding you back from your desired outcome, put it in actual writing. Name what you are afraid of. Write down what is worrying you. Look at what you’ve written, comb them from the inside out. Do they feel bigger than they are?
The truth is, fear is often just in our heads and when we write down what we are actually afraid of, it can be much different than what we thought. I heard this acronym the other day and it stuck with me…FEAR: FAKE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL
What is it that we are telling ourselves that just isn’t true? Replace these myths with statements that are true and perhaps you will feel the fear lift a little.
Begin!
Sometimes, the thing we actually need to do - is just start.
What is the next step you need to take to get a degree closer to what you want?
Even if it’s tiny. Even if it’s scary. Write it down.
Each step takes you closer than not moving at all. And in all honesty, you might just have to do it, afraid. An inch regularly over time will get you there, even if you are shaking. Fear often dissipates once we start moving.
As I said before, doing hard things is hard. It doesn’t mean we don’t do them and it doesn’t mean we don’t try! If you can make an incremental change, it’s still a change!
I am asking a lot of questions here. I am asking a lot of myself too. But it’s only because I am rooting for you to be your best self and go after what you actually want in life. And I don’t want anything to stop you in your tracks, especially fear, because it sure does take enough from us already, doesn’t it? Let’s not let it take away our dreams…whatever they may be.
Similar to those little 8-year-olds strutting into the theater, let’s embody a little more bravery than we actually have and see where it takes us! And when in doubt, remember that more than likely, everyone else in the room - is rooting for you!
XO,
Jenna
PS. Need help processing what you are thinking about? I’d love to help. Email me and we can set up a 1 on 1 call. :)
Further Reading on Overcoming Fear
How to Overcome Your Fears - Psychology Today
Ways to Face Your Fears - Very Well Mind
